I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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