Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
