this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Can you bring me the toilet please
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Randomize
