I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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