I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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