Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
