that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Oh god it's open bar.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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