I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
