it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
