I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
It's no shave November. This is our time.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
