please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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