Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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