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Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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