if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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