she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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