Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Randomize
