is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I am mentally ready for anal.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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