idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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