1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
