so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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