Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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