i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
