I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
