so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
