apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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