this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
