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after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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