belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
