That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
