he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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