So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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