She's JV to your varsity
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
