Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Randomize
