Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
the day after is always just damage control
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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