:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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