Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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