on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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