Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
