suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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