do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
