I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
