Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
