he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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