Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
she pinky promised me she was 18
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
