Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
being pregnant is like rehab
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
