My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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