I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
