Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
