Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
