So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
